A word about Gratitude and Acceptance
Sometimes we find ourselves being negative, or always looking at the cons instead of the pros, seeing the glass half empty. We may want to be in Gratitude and Acceptance of what life brings us, but we just default to wishing it were different. So here is what I want to say… we can try to change our reactions on the outer to try to be more positive, more accepting, more grateful but that usually doesn’t last very long… and we quickly fall back to our patterned behaviors.
In order to truly transform our behavior and reactions on the outer, we have to look at the underlying sentiments that we are harboring within, underneath those outer reactions and reflect on these: why do we feel negative, why do we want things differently, what is the part of us that feels unhappy, unheard, unseen, what are the unmet needs that are causing us to react in this way?
The truth is that our unmet needs continue to come up to the surface, until they are dealt with. Hiding it or trying to make ourselves forget these needy part of ourselves, only works until the next morning when you wake up and and say something negative to the partner that’s eager to see you.
You carry the Medicine… you are the LOVE
You are the only one that can meet your unmet needs. You have the medicine and that medicine is LOVE, understanding, compassion and the ability to acknowledge yourself. Befriend the part of you that is unhappy… that doesn’t have what she wants… that was never heard. Most likely these unmet needs may be coming from past relationship, childhood, or even other lifetimes. Let yourself journal with this part of you, so that you can meet your own needs; feel the feelings, hear the struggle, and witness your own pain in that place. It is only until you have given yourself the LOVE; by letting your feelings be expressed, understood and acknowledged, that your unmet needs will no longer need to lash out unnecessarily to be heard.
So here is the paradox; the most important thing about accepting life… being more open to the present moment and being grateful is that we have to first honor those qualities within us- honor and accept the part of ourselves that isn’t grateful, nor happy… the part of us that feels unheard, unseen and unloved. By meeting your own unmet needs, we shift the dynamic so that we can genuinely be in alignment with Gratitude and Acceptance.
In order to be in Gratitude and Acceptance with our outer life… we have to be in acceptance of our inner world; feelings, experience and states, including our neediness and unmet needs.
Finally, how do we do this? My suggestion is to sit with his part of you every morning, until it is no longer needed, with a journal and express your feelings around the reason you feel ungrateful, unhappy, etc.… regardless of how irrational they are. Their origin doesn’t matter, what matters is that you listen to your needs and you give yourself the LOVE, the understanding and acceptance you didn’t receive.
You are the MEDICINE of LOVE
You are the medicine… and the LOVE, so be with yourself, listen to yourself… not just when feelings are pleasant, but o the feelings that are unpleasant… to the neediness, to the disgruntled part that disturbs your heart ? and in doing so we heal ourselves by allowing the old places of pain to receive the medicine of LOVE that we carry.
Love & Light,
Dr. Leonor Murciano-Luna
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